Notes from an Old Mom
We all know 40 is the new 30 and math is sometimes ridiculous and unhelpful, right? So I’m not really an old mom but I have learned a few tricks in my time with Aidan.
When Aidan was little I blogged mostly for therapy and a little bit to help the world open their minds to my son. Now I think I blog to help, to connect and find those other people along the way that want my two cents.
Over time I’ve gotten more comfortable with the world of seizures, mobility, and AAC. It’s not just the living experience, it’s all the reading I do on a topic. I’m not much of a risk taker so I like to be prepared and know my options. So my head sometimes gets crammed with info and I shouldn’t keep it all to myself.
I’ve had approximately 47 thousand conversations with myself about what I want to be when I grow up, one of them resulting in a conversation with an even, ahem, wiser person who is farther along in this parenting journey. I call him my cheerleader because he is constantly encouraging me and helping me think things through. We had a lengthy talk about identity and how our children define us and when is that helpful and when is it overwhelming. Lately my thoughts about what I want to be when I grow up have been seen through the lens of what I could have been if I wasn’t Aidan’s mom. It’s a useless train of thought, I realize that. But what if somewhere inside me I’m really a banker or software programmer or architect? Also ridiculous.
As I’ve been sorting through who I am, what needs to get done, who should be doing it, I’ve been in constant contact with other parents. Some of my friends are needing to think through accessiblity issues in their homes. Several are just starting their AAC journey with their children. And some just need to know someone else gets the isolation and challenges of Disability World. There’s nothing I love more than hearing what another child has accomplished or answering particular questions.
I may always wrestle with this growing up question. But for now, while I have my own personal cheerleader, I guess I’ll be a cheerleader too.